what i once wanted

I once wanted to be a pastry chef.

(source: Ciao Laura)

(Incidentally, while doing an image search for pastry chef, I came across this image:

"The Pastry Chef"

(source: Janet Hill)

Which led me to the Janet Hill Studio blog.

 I'm sure I wouldn't have across it otherwise.

I looked around and her art is so darling!

I of course love their vintage feel:

"A Mystery Lady"

I also love the humor behind some of them:

"Flashy"

"Minne Was An Aggressive Driver"

"Paige Practices Poise"

But this one just may be my very favorite:

"The English Major"

Sorry for the diversion.

But don't you love it when you stumble across

something fabulous like that?)

A-hem. 

On that note.

I once wanted to be a "semi-famous" writer, go to a college 

with a good M.F.A. creative writing program, and spend as much 

time as possible with my favorite poet, Sharon Olds 

(who came in as second-favorite after my one-time "idol,"Anne Sexton.)

I once wanted to feel beautiful, be beautiful, because I felt 

that with it must come a certain level of confidence, one I never really had.

I once wanted to be the perfect mom, 

imagining how my kids would be sweet and cleanly dressed,

and happy as clams as I did nothing but nurture them 

with art projects, read them books,

baked them cookies, took them to the park,

and so on.

(This was waaaay before I had my own kids,

and reality set in!)

Isn't it funny to think back on the dreams you once had, 

or the things you once thought mattered?

Now--

I play "pastry chef" to my little monkeys.

I still want to take some cooking classes someday, though.

Just for fun.

I still love to read,

though the time for that is more limited now--

and even when it is there, my mind is oftentimes too tired

to want to do anything but sleep.

That desire to write and publish and teach isn't there so much anymore.

Perhaps it never was my "real" dream.

But I want to finish college.

 I got up to my junior year.

And feeling beautiful? 

Beauty means different things to me now.

I learned to gauge it in new ways.

That's one of the blessings of getting older, isn't it?

You start to learn what things really mean.

I may not feel like I should about myself

in terms of self-confidence and my appearance,

but neither does it weigh me down

like it once did.

(Wisdom also teaches one to look back at those pre-baby body

pics and think "my, you were crazy.")

Now I am a mom.

A real one--flaws and all.

Which means I lose my temper,

make mistakes, and question myself at times.

I sure do love my kids, though.

(But I still must be slightly crazy--because I look at those pics

of when they were little and want another!)

I've learned now that soul mates do exist.

Although they too are not "perfect" ;P

I think I've made peace with the dreams I once had.

Some have been let go, some have changed, some have come true.

Some wait to be discovered.

There's new ones--like to have a successful etsy shop.

Perhaps someday :)

I kind of feel l like I needed to have a little look

at my dreams like this. 

Give them a little nod, let them go forth, 

and look forward to the future.

And relish the dreams that are my here-and-now.

✰Christmas is coming early this year✰

November 5th, to be exact...

Sadly, I am not kidding when I say that I asked my husband if my early Christmas present could be to go to Portland for a garage sale. But no, not any garage sale! Don't get me wrong, I probably would drag him 2+ hours away for just one garage sale :D But this is "Portland's Largest Garage Sale," held at the Expo Center. I went to the sale homepage  to check it out, where they have a video about it...and drooled.

Old stuff, new stuff, used stuff, masses and masses of it,
all under one roof...really?

It will also be our first trip to Portland EVER. How exciting! I've heard so much about what an amazing city it is. It'll be so cool to finally be able to take a look around!

(note to self: google delicious sounding, well-reviewed places to eat. asap.)

(p.s., google thrift shops, too. so we'll have already spent hours at the world's, I mean Portland's, largest flea market...so?)

 (p.p.s. make sure hubby is in a good mood November 4th/5th. make that the best mood ever.)

✈ airport trip ✈

Things are getting more official around here.
We went to the bayfront for the first time

 since moving here 2 months ago, which seems as essential as having

 gone to the beach. I love all the little shops down there, although 

we didn't go look in them with the kids. 

This was purely a sea lion trip :) 

Which I can always appreciate.

The bayfront is up in Newport, about 45 minutes from here. 

Every time Addie hears us say we are going there, she asks,
 "Why are we going to the airport?"

 Not quite, honey.

On the way to Newport, we pass this shop.

Isn't it cool? It just beckons one to go inside,

although I have yet to do so.

It's called "Just Looking," see? :)

We parked close enough that we could hear

the sea lions before we saw them, as soon as we got out of the car.

Once this rock came into view, I kept pointing it out and asking Addie

if she could see them. "Where, where?" she would say.

I guess they do blend in rather well!

As soon as we got to the right spot,

Addie dashed ahead. 

Why are sleeping sea lions so fascinating to watch?

I don't know, but they are.

It was really funny actually to watch that big pile

of sea lions in the cage visible in the background.

They reminded me of kittens, the way they 

were draped all over one another. 

And when one would move, a particular grouchy sea lion

 would get mad and bellow loudly :)

Here are my boys.

After that, we walked down a bit to 

go see all the boats a bit better.

It's so pretty.

As horrible as it sounds, Addie is the only one

we trust to walk on her own at certain places.

As usual, against Dad's better judgment,

I caved and let Jakey get out of the stroller and walk.

A few minutes later and he was off,

running down the boardwalk and looking back 

with the most evil toddler grin as we yelled for him to come back.

I wish I could say the placement of Jakey 

right next to the "Live crab" sign was purely accidental,

but it was not.

Therefore, more of Addie this time.

With mama.

And of course, every girl needs a pic with her dad, too.

What moment have you enjoyed lately?

☛thrift store finds☚

Hello thrifting friends! 

Here are my finds for this week:

Now that Christmas is on the not-too-distant horizon,

I'm starting to think of holiday things more.

I'm one of those people who need it to be "near"

in order to shop for it.

I need to change that ;)

Anyway, these vintage tags struck me as really cute.

It's amazing, the choices, styles, etc. that even Christmas tags come in!

I love that these are "old-fashioned," 

and like the ones I remember from childhood.

I had to laugh after buying the following,

because I actually didn't realize it was a doll pattern.

Hmm, could that strangely stiffly positioned arms 

have given me a clue?

That, and the fact that "doll" is written on the front :)

No matter.

I don't have any sewing skills, anyway--

I just bought this because it was cute.

But Addie does have some 18" tall dolls,

so maybe I'll try making something for the first time.

This next one was also too cute to pass on.

I love the clothing styles and the illustrations.

And the personal touches are always

what seals the deal for me,

like the red penmanship noting

"Monty's" waist size.

This fabric was so adorable,

I knew I had to bring it home with me.

I really adore patchwork stuff.

This patchwork dog was so darling.

I like picking out my favorite fabrics on things like this :)

Vintage blankets of any kind,

but especially baby blankets, are something I could never tire of.

There's something so sweet a vintage baby blanket.

I liked how bright and cheerful it was,

as well as the cute farm theme.

Another vintage pony book for my collection.

I wish I would've taken pictures of the illustrations inside.

I really like them.

Finally, my find from awhile back--this fabulous 70's kitchen art.

After what seems eons, I got this listed in my shop.

I forget if I've shown it before,

but taking photos of them again reminded me of how cool I think they are :)

They are original, and signed "Josie 71" on the bottom.

Isn't Josie such a 1970's name?

I think it's cute.

But maybe that's just because It think of Josie and the Pussycats.

What favorite finds have you discovered lately?

For more, please stop by:

Her Library Adventures

Apron Thrift Girl

Dear Daughter

Dear Daughter,

You keep surprising us with the clarity and subject matter of your photographs.

Like: Dada pushing an empty stroller.

Or: Mama holding some rocks as your force her 

to smile and say "Strawberry Shortcake!!!"

Don't get me wrong.

More often than not the photos you take with my phone

are of your hand.

Up close.

Nonetheless, I'm proud of you

and you can still grow up to be

Annie Liebovitz if you want to.

Love you forever,

Mommy